2018 Week 36: Bushwack Part Deux

IMG_0100

Task 36 of 50 Weeks to a Lighter More Loving You is an extension of Week 35:  BUSHWACK…Part Deux (two).

(If you are just joining this or missed last week, click here.)

Now that we have written out and become more aware of our thoughts, how does one go about BUSHWACKing a new trail in our mind…especially the thoughts that cause suffering?

Suffering?  

  • Any thought that causes pain and often manifesting as guilt, shame, sadness, anxiety, depression, anger, tension, stress, fear, self-hate.

  • A thought that leads to or is full of blaming another, justifying a behavior, and/or defending your self.

  • Thoughts that cause us to act un-lovingly towards our self or others.

If you came to me and said something to the effect of wanting more peace, joy, and  love in your life, we would spend the majority of our time looking at what you are thinking and believing.

Our thought life creates the life we live.  What we think we will bring about because what we think effects our choices and our behaviors.

If you did last week’s task, you’ve done the first step, which is AWARENESS of the thought.

Journaling is a great way to see and be aware of your thoughts.

Meditation is a wonderful way to watch your thoughts.

AWARENESS is the first step.

Second step?

SIT!!

STOP and SIT!

I know you will be in conversations and situations where you just can’t plop down for a SIT.   But you can recognize you are on the a “suffering trail” and halt yourself before doing something unloving towards another or yourself. Then go sit.

Your job while sitting is to be curious.

  • Did something trigger me to go down that trail?

  • What am I feeling?

  • Is that a past feeling?

  • Is there fear?  And about what?

  • What am I believing that might not be true?

Your task for this week is to SIT with one of your “suffering trails”…one of your thoughts that are causing you to live or act in a way other than you desire.

Bring your journal to your SIT, write it all out.

OR find a loving, non-judgmental friend who asks really good questions, and talk through it.

OR contact me and we will explore your trail together.

Cheering You on to a Whole Sit and Be Curious Heart,
Barbara

cropped-011114_2043_selfcompass1

 

 

 

 

 

 

2018 Week 32: Take Your Shoes Off

images

Week 32’s task of 50 Weeks to a Lighter More Loving You is to TAKE OFF YOUR SHOES…Please!

Maybe you or you have friends that like to have shoes removed when coming into the house.

No matter the reason for this, it is a BOUNDARY that has been set to come in to yours or their home.

This week, take a look at your boundaries.

Boundaries are limits, lines, parameters, that you set in regards to your

  • stuff,

  • emotions,

  • health,

  • body,

  • spirituality.

Loving your self and loving others takes BOUNDARIES.

Check out THIS ARTICLE for an easy, quick description of boundaries.

Setting boundaries are not always easy.  One of the tell-tale signs of needing a boundary is a negative emotion–anger, blame, anxiety, frustration, depression, etc. 

I was never the best at this, but the more I got to know my self, the easier it was to recognize the need to set a boundary, understand what I needed, and speak up. Taking the time to journal helped with this process.  Journaling is a great way to voice emotions, learn about your self and what you need, and to do it in a safe place…your journal!

This week, take a look at your boundaries.  

Do you have a negative emotion floating around in you that might be telling you that a boundary is needed OR one that needs to be updated?

While BOUNDARIES sound LIMITING, it actually allows for more freedom and love. Feel free to share in the comments how you found that to be true in your life!

Cheering You on to a Whole Boundary Loved Heart,
Barbara

cropped-011114_2043_selfcompass1

CHECK IN for Week 19: Do You Know…?

images (12)

Checking in for Week 19  of 50 Weeks to a Lighter More Loving You.

Did you journal your list of WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY?

To have a Lighter More Loving You, knowing yourself is imperative. Knowing who you are, and part of that is knowing what makes you happy, will better serve you in…

  • your choices
  • fulfilling your purpose
  • finding what is meaningful in life
  • positively effecting others.

Sharing from a blog post from a guest writer on Becoming Minimalist, take a look at this list of happiness cultivators.  I’m sure you may find that some of yours fit into these categories.  And maybe there are few you’d like to try.

This information is from the University of Amherst professor Catherine A. Sanderson, author of Science of Happiness. She is known as “The Happiness Professor.” Sanderson explained that there are 10 ways to increase your everyday happiness, according to decades worth of scientific research:

1. Make little changes in your daily routine, such as getting more sleep, exercising, getting out into nature, and meditating.

2. Read more books. Read books to learn—research suggests that lifelong learners remain healthy and engaged, and live long lives. Read books as an escape from your everyday life, Read books—it will make you happy.

3. Find your right fit or match, both personally and professionally. If you love what you do and who you are with, you’ll position yourself for personal happiness and professional success.

4. Be grateful. Sanderson suggested two specific activities to help foster a greater sense of gratitude. First, keep a daily gratitude journal. Second, pay a “gratitude visit” to someone from your past who has had a significant impact on your life, and let them know how you feel.

5. Smile more—even if you don’t feel like it. Research shows that the simple act of smiling can trick your brain into a happier state.

6. Relish simple, everyday momentsAppreciating life’s small moments, such as a beautiful, sunny day, green shoots sprouting from the ground, and skipping rocks at the beach, teaches you to be more grateful for what you have, especially during moments of stress and angst.

7. Perform random acts of kindness. Do good deeds. Volunteer. Be charitable. Shop (for someone else!). Numerous studies have shown that you can help yourself by doing good for others.

8. Spend money on experiences versus thingsStudies have shown that buying an object—a car, handbag, or kitchen gadget—can quickly lead to buyer’s remorse. On the other hand, investing in experiences—a concert, a camping trip, music lessons—leads to greater happiness. Experiences create “happiness residue,” and our perceptions of them often get better over time.

9. Avoid comparisons. Whatever you may think of someone else’s life, particularly as viewed through the phony, filtered lens of social media, it’s almost certainly messier than you imagine. It’s easier to embrace, and learn to love, your own imperfections, if you don’t conjure up myths about how perfect everyone else’s lives seem.

10. Build and maintain close relationships. According to Sanderson, having a small number of tight, meaningful relationships is one of the highest predictor of happiness.

Encouraging You to a Whole Happiness Known Heart,

Barbara

cropped-011114_2043_selfcompass1

2018 Week 19: Do You Know??

images (12)

Week 19’s task of 50 Weeks to a Lighter More Loving You is…

Do You Know….WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY?

This week pull out that journal, notebook, or scrap of paper (that you might want to put in a journal or notebook!!), and make a list of what makes you happy.


You know that journal, notebook or scraps of paper that you used to write down…

it’s time to pull it out again!

The intention of this post is not to give a big shout out to the importance of JOURNALING to a Lighter More Loving You, though it’s tempting because it is SOOOO IMPORTANT!

If you haven’t been journaling, I strongly, with great vigor, and wholeheartedly, urge, spur, and inspire you to do so!

This week, set a timer for 10 minutes, get out (or go get that journal) and list WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY!

I’ll share in the CHECK IN what researchers who have been studying “happy people” for over a decade, say aids in our happiness.

Cheering You on to a Whole HAPPY LIST IN YOUR JOURNAL Heart,
Barbara

cropped-011114_2043_selfcompass1